I have a testimony that God HAS HEALED ME OF A SLOW LEARNING DISABILITY AND I'M SO SMART AND I CAN learn anything how I want to. I'm studying to be a surgeon and most of this stuff, I learned on my own.. I'm not getting from a book like most  people have to. I'm studying surgical incisions and skin grafting and I'm so excited about the outcome  of what I learn, but I have a little problem  that I have overlooked and I have tried to be very very nice and I've coped with it to the best of my ability but today is one of those days that I needed to unload in which I feel very guilty and I feel like  if I get mad, then I'm losing control because I'm a perfectionist, anyway, I feel that I had about all I can stand. I NEED TO KNOW THE ANSWER that when I  get around certain people.. bottom line, I cannot concentrate around certain people knowing that they treat me like a baby,  my whole environment is that I'm not being challenged and I feel that the way they treat me is very discouraging and I WANT TO BE OUT ON MY OWN SOON!!!!!! I'm on the waiting list for an apartment but who knows how long that will be and I'm running out of patience I seriously do not know how much more of  this I can take. The way people have  treated me in the past until now has really cut me deep and I have been sooo hurt about it.. What do I do? I'm running out of options..If you could I would very much appreciate opnions and different points of view concerning this matter.. I mean how can you  forget your past if people are always reminding you that you aren't with it??? I am very hurt that I even had a slow learning disability and I am very hurt that my biological mother popped those idiotic pain pills, I'm sure and made me go through alot of unnecessary things in my life like people still wanting to do things for me... In a way I don't regret it becuase I can look back and say.. wow I sure have overcome alot...

I have made an error in my testimony and I had to repent.

It appears that I did NOT have the right attitude about sharing my testimony and I ended up whining about things that shouldn't matter to me, I mean who cares what people think and how they treat me??  I had a talk with myself in the house and I told myself that  the reason I'm still hurt is because when I found out that I had the slow learning disability, I immediately went into denial and that prevents you from accepting things and being content until God heals you and I put myself through alot of pain from not accepting things and not handling it correctly. I came to the conclusion that I say and have said many times that I forgive my biological parents, nevertheless they could not help themselves at the time, but there are t imes when I'm not so forgiving and I asked myself if I really forgave them...and I told God that I was sorry for making that humungous error and I need to tell God that I am sorry for ever being angry in the first place I started counting my blessings and God is so great to me with His everlasting peace and His forgiveness and I apologize for being hateful in my previous post... and I apologize one hundred times over for my griping and complaints.